Dungeon Siege movie
- Thread starter Harlock
- Start date
This was the biggest piece of crap I have ever seen...despite hot babes swinging from vines, ron perlman, and burt reynolds....and the dood who played the nephew (who is from slc punk, hackers, and a host of other movies) they could not make the movie suck any less than it did. The wanna be epic music that swelled up from the beginning of the not so epic turnip pulling session in the beginning, though looked good...made my ears bleed, and I almost walked out then and there...The amount of cheese that ran rampant through the movie bled out from behind the silver screen and congealed in the front row filling the theater with a palpable sense of lactose intolerance. Ray Liota, once again does his best to be a hateable badguy, and perhaps if he wasn't dressed like someone doing a Liberache/Elvis impression I might have been more scared...
The portrayal of magic was pretty cool, and the blond magus chick well she was also on the hot babes list...
The sad part is (much like "the last legion") everyone looked pimp, and the acting was not that bad, just the script could have been written better by blindfolded drunken monkies on acid hurling feces at a wall...but badass actors aside, without good direction, a crappy script is still a crappy script, and it looked like nothing more than a really poorly done version of LOTR.
not to mention every fight scene with Jason Statham ends with his arms out with his hands and sword exiting the "frame" and I can't tell if he's trying to disembowel someone or if he is declaring a runner safe.
The "krugs" their version of orcs had the only redeemable acting during the entire movie, well all but farmers wife, who cries on cue, when they load themselves while on fire into catapults to shoot themselves into the humans lines...O and lets not forget the chinese immortal wannabee's who have leather grotesques (masks) and fight with two single edged curved shortswords as well..
Gimmie a break...I'd rather watch a bad larp documentary...o wait..I have...
crap.
The portrayal of magic was pretty cool, and the blond magus chick well she was also on the hot babes list...
The sad part is (much like "the last legion") everyone looked pimp, and the acting was not that bad, just the script could have been written better by blindfolded drunken monkies on acid hurling feces at a wall...but badass actors aside, without good direction, a crappy script is still a crappy script, and it looked like nothing more than a really poorly done version of LOTR.
not to mention every fight scene with Jason Statham ends with his arms out with his hands and sword exiting the "frame" and I can't tell if he's trying to disembowel someone or if he is declaring a runner safe.
The "krugs" their version of orcs had the only redeemable acting during the entire movie, well all but farmers wife, who cries on cue, when they load themselves while on fire into catapults to shoot themselves into the humans lines...O and lets not forget the chinese immortal wannabee's who have leather grotesques (masks) and fight with two single edged curved shortswords as well..
Gimmie a break...I'd rather watch a bad larp documentary...o wait..I have...
crap.
Seattle_Dave
Newbie
I don't think he liked it... would you like it in a Fox? Would you like it with a box?
I saw the movie in the theater. I know the horror he speaks of. Since I knew it was an Uwe Boll movie, I knew it would be awful. I was ready for a bad script. But the music... damn... It was so loud and not right for the scenes they're supposed to enhance. I want to strangle whoever was in charge of that.
Maxondaerth
Squire
What I want to know is who they got to play the pack mule that joins the party later in the game/movie to carry all the lewt? That was a pivotal role in the game assumed they had to have it in the movie!
Heh, no I didn't like it...in fact you could go so far as to say I loathed the very digital pixels that were defiled in it's creation...if I were an alien species watching us...I would order an orbital bombardment on the director, editor, and sound mixers house, with them, and all their genetic relations inside.