Goods, Rentals, and Advertising

C

CaptainYork

Artisan
Greetings gregarious good persons! It is that trepidatious time once more in which I will endeavor to provide plenty of provisions to your personage. If you have any requests please let me know as soon as you are able so that I can stifle your spirits solicitude. Among my usual wares I will also be providing new and perhaps to some of your opinions more practical goods such as Magic Item rentals, general equipment and goods (such as weapons, potions, and elixirs), as well as some specialty items such as Ritual Reagents capable of traversing the mists. I am still expecting a parcel of goods from a partner and as such do not have a full accounting of everything that will be available but I hope to do so by Friday evening.

Amongst the Magic Item rentals I will have available include a rendered shield, a tabbard that acts as a suit of armor capable of taking a Lightning Storm worth of damage, an item capable of casting a Magic Armor twice a day, and many more! Do you intend to fight a necromancer? Rent a Cloak Necromancy or a Spell shield! Do you have a warrior friend who fights enemies just beyond their actual abilities? Rent a Magic Armor and keep him on his feet!

-Oliver Oleander, conveyor of confections and chattel
 
I'm still waiting for that money I've requested 2 SEPARATE TIMES from you people! Can you maybe accommodate me with that?! I WILL take it by force if you refuse me again you pests! Nobody breaks our cave and gets away with it.

I expect 300G ready for payment upon my arrival on Saturday, or I will strip it from your belongings. You have NO IDEA how expensive it is to run a business these days, especially when you have pesky adventurers committing arson and destruction of private property!

Goduk,
Overseer of Business Operations,
Malicious Investments Inc.
 
Overseer Goduk,
While I can understand your position, I would ask that you please refrain from shanghaiing my marketing in the future. If you wish to schedule another consultation with myself I'm sure we can arrange something, though I'm sure by now you are aware that my fees can be rather steep.

Unfortunately as to your fee I do not owe you anything as the bill I was provided with did in no way pertain to me as I am a free agent who does not speak for the adventuring community nor did I participate in the destruction of your property or injury of you or your employees person. I'll admit I'm a bit curious as to what additional fees you think have been accrued on your bill since I was last asked to consult upon it as your emissary was not harmed and no further property had been damaged to my knowledge as well as the fact that no one who owes you any fees actually refused to pay them. If you are just tacking on fees without reason that may make your business practices seem a tad shady.

If you insist upon threatening force upon persons or belongings of members of the community a third time (the first time being remarks made on your behalf by an envoy last month and the second time remarks made by yourself here) I'm afraid I shall have to formally inform the authorities of your extortionist threats.

I hope that your envoy has been able to gather the funds to pay my consultation fees, I am of course open to payment plans if need.

-Oliver Oleander
 
I'll show you payment you weasel! I'll pay you your fees in my presence and since you're so reluctant to deliver me the gold, you can pay me in blood, sweat, and the building materials that I'll strip from your ramshackle town after I raid it! After that, perhaps we can negotiate the sale of those materials back to your pathetic population at reasonable prices, reasonable to me of course. I'm coming to collect on my capital and settle these payments your town has owed me since they blew up our cavern office 4 months ago, and I'm starting with you Oliver Oleander!

Goduk,
Overseer of Business Operations,
Malicious Investments Inc.
 
Olie,

Ignore that Goduk person. What I's wants to know is what yous are goings to be doing to our spirits??? Is stifling and soli--- something even legals???

It sures does not sound good to me :(

Your Mystic friend, Trixie
 
Goduk,
If the town you are referring to is Horizon I'm afraid myself and the town guard will have something to say about that. If you have debts to settle with the adventuring community that's your business but if you come after Horizon then the Kings justice will be swift and I will personally drag whatever is left of you to the Baron for judgement.

-Corporal York Winters, Sheriff of Shademarch.
 
Trixie, solicitude is worrying or being concerned about something. My intention is to stifle or stop as it were the worrying or concern you may feel in your spirit, using delicious foods and beverages as desired. So please list luxurious (fancy) libations (drinks) or coveted (wanted) comestibles (food) that you may desire so that I can have them on hand for you to purchase and enjoy!

Goduk, I am addressing you secondly even though you replied to me before Trixie in order to give offense, specifically for your beastly attitude and unnecessarily aggressive words. If you come to the tavern on Saturday I shall have everything owed to you supplied in a box, but should you send another envoy in your place I will subtract fees for my time wasted from your payment. It also seems that my notification of the authorities of your threats is rendered moot as Sheriff Winters seems to have noticed the situation already.

-Oliver Oleander Chandler of Consultations, Comestibles, and Coin
 
Goduk,

Harm a single person, or touch a single building in my town and I will put you and your kind into the ground faster than my explosive friend did.

Asher
 
I have spent last two months training men to guard this town. You will not touch it. My spirit will be sundered hundred hundred times by the corrupt before you lay a hand on these people who I protect. You will not be a stain upon the earth when we are done with you.

Ragnarok
 
I'm in line with Ragnarok and Asher. You won't get near town, I do not think you understand the people you're dealing with. My apprentice has put it most eloquently, we fight the corrupt. You and whatever handful of men you have won't even get close.

Mr. Oleander, I would pay handsomely for raspberry pastries. Seriously. Anything baked with raspberry.

-Bethanne
 
Bethanne, last month I had some lovely raspberry pastries I will see if my supplier has something similar this month.
 
Wonderful, I do so love raspberry pastries. And white chocolate. I've been a little cut off from the world for roughly a year so delicacies and delights are something I will pay serious gold for.

Bethanne
 
Oliver,

You lightning storm tabard armor still be able for rent? Me want rent from you.

-Cho Ko Nu
 
Cho Ko Nu, the tabbard is available yes, I feel I should warn you however that it is crafted with Celestial magic.

-Oliver Oleander
 
Excuse, me good hobling do you actually walue honestey and integvvity overz the profit. Ztrange vorld ve live in zome dayz.

Kit
 
Kit, I am assuming your comment is in regards to my telling tribesman Cho Ko Nu that the item he showed interest in was Celestial in nature? Honesty and Integrity should not be opposed to or mutually exclusive from profit. I am confident in my goods and abilities enough to not need to trick or cheat anyone into purchasing from me. I take no offense from your comment and hope that none was intended, there are certainly some individuals who give my profession(s) a bad name. Besides, as my father is always fond of saying "A happy customer is a repeating customer". I would rather build a reputation of trust and honesty with my customers, especially since I'm hoping to build up my operations in Horizon and the surrounding area.

If you have any interest in my wares or indeed if you would care to converse with me on any individuals who have given you such a negative view I would be.... curious as to the identity of such persons, please seek me out if you will be in the area.

-Oliver Olwen Oleander, trader of tasty treats
 
No offenze to vou, merely a zurrpized remark ov gladnesz at a refreszing breath ov honest mercantile exchange. I vill happily zpeak vith vou anf perhaps buy zome ov your varez.

Kit
 
Oliver,

We make good trade for it. Reserve for me please.

-Cho Ko Nu
 
Olie - Hooray!! Thanks for alls the splaining - nows I has new words for my speakings :) I likes all your goodies - spent much moneys on them last markets day, not that I is complaining - was very goods!!

~~Trixie
 
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