Journeyman Marsters, Plutonian Apprentice and member of the Shadows light,
My apologizes, I was under the impression I had apologized profusely to everyone involved, likely including some who where not as well. Perhaps it is my Barrister training and ways that made my main speech not carry enough weight, as admitting fault, or error, is the sincerest form of apology among those who practice my art. I recall apologizing immediately upon regaining my mind, I recall apologizing to Milosh, specifically and all those near-by when I regained my feet. I recall traveling to Valadanis to apologize personally to Bob, Tadron, and the other members of the House of Games. I wrote letters, I paid monies for damages for all those requested and set up an account with Bob to replace any weapons or equipment claimed to be damaged during the attack.
Since that time I have struggled with this disease mightily, at times I have felt it's near master, at other times I find myself holding onto my humanity by the thinnest of threads. I have depended on the council of our knights, a few others whose council I trusted and whose discretion was expected, it seems the discretion at least is no longer an issue.
As to resurrecting, I have a number of concerns about that, first life is not cheap, I have never been of the belief that I have an exceptionally strong spirit like you adventurers seemed to be graced with. To put it bluntly, I'm not a brave enough man to risk meeting my permanent end just to make things easier. Second, lychanthropy is no simple disease, it is capable of bonding to a spirit and surviving Resurrection, as can be seen by our local werebear tribe, it might be possible that such a Resurrection would ingrain the effects so deeply they could not be over come. Since that first, unexpected, situation I have traveled constantly with companions that have sworn to send me to my end before allowing me to transform and send anyone else to theirs. I am not sure what justice would be served by adding another spirit to the pile of this tragedy.
Those who come with me to attempt to cure this disease will have my thanks, I have repeated stated that I have no authority, no power to compel others to come with me in this task. However I have seen such acts of strength, courage, honor, and compassion in the service to the adventurers in this town in their travels that I have allowed myself to dare to hope there are some willing to help me cure this disease in a repeatable manner we can use on others suffering from the same affliction, I am unwilling to risk another to this method without being sure it works. If you chose not to come Eric, that is your right, as it is for anyone else not willing, wishing, or able, I hold no grudges, that being said, I, and those that will come with me will be attempting to cleanse this affliction, and additional bodies help many any task easier, and safer.
For my part, to be clear for both yourself and anyone else listening to the dreamscape, I take responsibility for my actions, but only those that can be fairly contributed to me. I am sorry for overreaching beyond my power in my desire to create a life item for the town, I am sorry that my unwitting acceptance of assistance from a fey caused this affliction to slip into town and cause the carnage it did. I am not however sorry for not being in control of myself when control was taken from me by the force of the disease. I do the best I can to make amends for the errors I have committed, but I will not waste time making amends, apologies, or excuses for those things I could not control.
Wayside is a dangerous place, I have not been the first to fall afoul of powers beyond my might to control, and while I continue to regret my missteps, I am determined to keep my eyes on the path before me, not on the pitfalls behind me.
Once again Marsters, as publicly as I know how to say it, I'm Sorry. If you wish anything more of me regarding this manner, I ask that you request it before the close of the next market day, should anyone else hearing my voice feel I owe them any debt, be it simple apologize or something grander, I would ask the same as we cannot spend our lives forever looking to the past.
-Humbly,
Enan Bluewater