The Rules of Adventuring.


1. When in doubt, run away.

2. It's always an ambush.

3. It's always a necromancer.
4. If it offers you phenomenal power for a tiny favor, it is not your friend.

5. (From Kzoo) The plural of Apocalypse is Apocalypses. If you need to know this, you're already screwed.

6. The more you want to touch the creepy talking item, the less of a good idea it is.
7. If it's not an ambush, it's an amhedgerow.

8. If someone asks if you're a dragon mage, you say YES!

9. If it walks like a duck, quacks like a duck, and swims like a duck, don't you for one minute believe that things a duck.

10. It always takes way longer to walk to the big bad guy than it does to walk back.
11. If it says it can kill you, and everyone else says it can kill, you are still not powerful enough to kill it, no matter how much you think so.
12. Just remember, you are always allowed to say, "No, I DON'T think that's a good idea." Regardless of what the entire town is marching off to do, you don't have to go along. Besides, they'll probably need NPC's!

13. A smiling NPC is rarely a good thing.

Also, I'd just like to reiterate Number 4. A Million times over.
14. Never trust the NPC who says "look, I'm just here to talk to the adventurers." Odds are they're probably there for a reason.

15. Resist the urge to say "I told you so" every time you predict what's going to go wrong.

16. Never trust that the people in charge actually know what they're doing.

17. If something comes into town asking for you by name, it's always trying to kill you.

18. Don't touch anything. Seriously. I mean it. Don't touch the- *ZORCH*
19. If your out of ideas you can always wait... the fight will come to you. (your mileage will vary)
20. Do not grab the rifting dragonmage... it will not end well... ever.
21. If its a voice in your head do not respond.
22. When if doubt "Eff it rezz em all" thats what Amnesias are for.
23. If someone does not identify themselves while walking toward you in the dark they are a problem.
24. "Get Em" is occasionally a good plan
25. Get your opponent to start monologing they are easier to jump that way.
26. When you get fed up with no one listening to you, start writing down your predictions. That way you have proof you were right.
27. If they introduce themselves as "a Simple Healer", they're a Necromancer.

28. An "easy romp through a goblin cave" is always suicide; the "the insane, last-ditch assault on the deepest cavern of the Necromancer's keep" is always filled with happiness and loot.

29. Voices in your head are ALWAYS bad news.

30. Never trust a hobling who's looking for pie.

31. Never trust anyone from Janus Falls.
32. Beware of anyone who casually refers to his or her underlings as "minions."

33. If someone comes asking for help with a task, five people helping is probably too few and seven people probably too many.
34a. Unless it's a newly born baby dragon. Then be very, very nice because it might save your behind later.

35. ALWAYS ASK FOR GREEN TAGS! It might make for some fun plot later :)
36. When asked what level you are, ask why. If it's for scaling, answer by half. If for treasure calculation, by double.
37: it is never a good idea to tell plot that you are bored
oceanfredrick said:
37: it is never a good idea to tell plot that you are bored
¡oh! that should be 37 AND 38! this should be listed in the core rules somewhere ;)
39: Always always always denounce and decry necromancy as the utmost evil in the world...unless you're in the presence of a necromancer that's saving your ***.
40: If a beautiful woman wishes to speak with you privately in the woods at night, it's not because she thinks you're cute.
41: When running to save the damsel, make sure you're not too tired when you get there to actually save her.
42: Don't bring anything with you on an adventure that you don't want broken, dirty or lost.
43: When you hear 'oops' come from the circle during a ritual, it is a good time to practice your long distance running.
44: It's not considered stealing if your fast enough.
45: shatters always curve in teh direction of those without rendered gear.
46: (stolen from someones signature) 5 mins is shorter than you think, ten mins is longer.
47: Starting a relationship with a villian, no mater how weird the circumstances of that relationship, will get you in trouble later on.
48: You should have been a farmer.
49: Being a non adventureer in a world with adventurers is a horrible fate.